Dating is always such a delicate dance. You don’t want to make the wrong move, and God forbid you take the wrong step that causes you to fall. Dating is a hormonally charged experience that involves a lot of guessing, hoping and wondering if and how much the other person likes you. While women can spend hours deciphering the different hidden meanings a one-sentence text message has, the truth is, there is not much science in figuring out if the apple of your eye is in to you…
If a guy likes you:
- He will call you. No, your phone isn’t broken. No, his text message/email didn’t get lost in cyberspace. He simply hasn’t tried to contact you. And if for some reason the cyber boogyman intercepted his message from hitting your inbox, he will eventually try to contact you a second time. Men who like you will initiate communication with you.
- He will try to see you. If a guy is into you, he will make the effort to see you again. It doesn’t matter how busy he is, if he feels that getting to know you is a priority, he will make time in his schedule to meet you.
- He will touch you. Observe his body language as it speaks volumes. When a guy is interested, he will make subtle body contact. For example, he may lightly touch your arm or gently place his hand behind your back or waist. High fives and elbow nudges don’t count.
- He will make future plans with you. When a man is interested in you, he will want to secure seeing you again and will likely do so before the first date is over. He will find a common interest and suggest “We should do that…” Even if he doesn’t solidify plans right then and there, he will allude to future plans with you in it.
- He will text you out of the blue. Perhaps he saw something that reminded him of you. Perhaps he’s trying to start a conversation. Regardless, random, spontaneous texts show that for whatever reason it may be, he is thinking of you.
- He will ask you out. No explanation required. Men who like you will ask you out. True, you may need to give him some indicators that you are not going to flat out reject him (because most men are secretly quite afraid of rejection from a woman). So throw a dog a bone, and sit back. If he’s into you, he’ll initiate making plans with you
[infobox bg=”bluelight” color=”black” opacity=”on” subtitle=”Sima Kumar”]”Guys don’t speak code. If he is into you HE WILL LET YOU KNOW. Everything else is you making up stories. Sorry ladies.”[/infobox]
Photo credit: Margaret Trudell
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Huh. I have a male friend who swears up, down, left, and right that he is straight straight straight. I am not straight. My “straight” friend has done ALL of these things, and still does, especially the texting and touching parts. There was a point that we were in contact so much and together so often that people started making jokes about how we’d apparently gotten married, lol.
That aside, I do find these opinions to be a little generalized. I never touch someone I’m interested in until I know for certain that it’s okay to do so. I don’t use the phone as I have a genuine phobia of it (no, really – look it up, it’s actually a thing for a lot of people). But I’ll text all day or send FB messages or email or whatever.
Lots of leeway here, I’d say.
What exactly is being implied by the phrase “.. you may need to give him some indicators that you aren’t going to flat out reject him.”
Is the dating world so twisted that it all comes down to subtle implications or using reverse psychology? Of course anyone who wants to pursue the relationship further would communicate their desire to follow up with them!
This world lacks honesty, integrety, sincerety, logic, and actual “love”. It’s become a sick world of games and arrogant self-promotion.
I say what I mean, not in code but in honest sentences. I respect women’s space and I avoid making her uncomfortable. If she tells me “no”, than I respect that, because if I don’t, chasing after her will simply make me a stalker. I was once “dumped”, because I was “too respectful” to a girl, who I truly loved. I HATE mind games. No successful relationship can stem from twisted games and selfish manipulation. This world has no idea what “love”, actually is, and those who do aren’t strong enough to actually bare the pain that real love can sometimes bring. What a sad, sad world we live in.
you have no clue how your words are the most legit thing i’ve read in awhile and i totally agree with you, it’s really sad how relationship nowdays are turning up into games.
thx for putting into words what i’ve been thinking xD
Amen !!!!! I’m totaly agree with every words that u just said. Its too complicated now and like u said its a freaking mind game its not love anymore its a psychologic war who’s gonna give up first and say i love u and the first one who will said it loose the game. you are right we living in a sick world.
marry me Justin 🙂 i love straighforward people. I LOATHE this game ‘love’ has been turned into
I have a crush on someone at work, we exchanged texts for 3 months, we tried to meet up outside of work but things just got in the way. We sadly never met up and he lost interest and stop talking to me completely, be even started ignoring me at work. I let things lie for a week and things have become better as he’s talking to me again and flirting a little. I would like to give things a second chance, but this time instead of me doing most of the chasing and effort into meeting up, im going to take things slow and make him work for it. I would like us to be how were before he stopped talking to me and actually go out on date. What advice would you give? Thanks x
My advice to you RedLadyBug is don’t dip your pen in the company ink. Dating co-workers is not recommended because it’s bad for business, it’s very risky and can lead to career suicide if things go awry. Sounds as if the guy ‘friend-zoned’ you when he stopped talking. My advice is be friendly and professional; and pursue another guy outside your working place. Keep your options open. And don’t make guys ‘work’ to get you. We don’t like that. This isn’t a competition. Open your mind and your heart and, like the article says, if he’s into you, he’ll make time. Good luck!
What he says contradicts with his actions… 🙁
After reading this, I’ve finally come to admit to myself that he doesn’t like me just the way I do and it hurts but I have to accept it. ‘Guess time to move forward.
Gela,
I feel the exact same way about my guy but moving on is so so hard. atleast I have his texts now but if I end it..
Hmm, I’m not sure about this article. I mean, some guys are perfectly straight forward like this, but there is also a TON of info on the web about how guys pull back after texting you non stop for weeks. The theory is that they see women as clingy or having no life if they are always texting you back promptly. Never mind that you happen to have your phone on you pretty much all the time and would answer a text to one of your girl friends just as promptly as if a guy texts you because…..you phone is RIGHT there. Nooo, can’t do that or he thinks your desperate. Wait several hours, always be the one to end the conversation, blah, blah, blah….and he will want you more. Stop texting altogether and he will really pine for you. This is ALL over the web and have experienced this more than once. If I show interest I get flaky responses from guys. If I become MIA in texting, they try harder. I don;t agree with this article that you can be totally straight forward. Guys play games, especially when it comes to texting. What planet are you from?????
i have a doubt….there is this guy…whom i met in a gettogether..he stared at me..but when i stared at him,he turned away..this happened like…3 or 4 times…..this is common..i know!!!but,the last time when he saw me…..he thought i wasn’t looking at him but he was continuously ataring at me..i mean “continuously” like say for 7 to 8 seconds..then i thought this is getting too much and i looked at him and u no what he did..the same story..turned away!!!this is driving me crazy since then…the same day when i was upset for something..he came closer…but dint speak a word…cos his mom was staring at him:P i dunno how to interpret this..please help me!!
I’m in the same shoe as you . I don’t knw if he like me or not. this is driving me crazy too. can he just make a move already…. -_-‘
I have a friend who does exactly all of those on the list except the calling part. He’d only call me when he has to. Anyways, I’m still not sure though if he likes me in that way.
I have a boy friiend but he does nt ve my tym complains all tym dat he is busy am frustrated neva had a luvn guy n my lyf b4 pls hlp me out i nid ur advice plssss
Hey,
I have this guy friend. We get along pretty well and we text and message each other regularly. We’ve been to the movies twice. He asked me to prom when we were in HS but then backed out and avoided me, leaving me to wonder and go by my self. Then, when we graduated he asked me out but when I asked why he wanted to date me he backed out and said we go slow as friends and see what happens. He’s so confusing and I’m not sure how to handle this. We don’t talk about anything other than music and movies and when we do see each other he seems interested but he doesn’t touch me, call me or make future plans with. We’ve both told each other we like each other but I’m not sure if he’s taking me seriously and I’m afraid he might back out if something comes up again.