5 Life Lessons To Create Joy

Sometimes the most valuable, life changing lessons and opportunities for growth come disguised in the ugliest of packages.

Written by Amy C · 1 min read >
5 Life Lessons To Create Joy - Heart Hackers Club -  - 2016 Burning Man

My heart is so full from all the birthday love. As I reflect on what has been one of the most monumental years of growth for me, I want to share with you a few major lessons learned :

You get the love you give

You give or you take. You deposit energy in others or you withdraw. This is not static, it’s a choice. It’s about being intentional about how you want to show up in your interactions. Give, but be conscious of where that  giving is rooted in. Does it come from a place of neediness, craving for validation, credit or to be liked? Or is your act of giving rooted in abundance, love, and kindness? The kind of giving that is rooted in ego is actually no different from taking.

Separate fact from fiction

There are the facts and there are the stories you attach to those facts. Often the suffering, anxiety and resentment we have is self-made by creating stories, making assumptions and applying false judgements. You save a lot of time and energy when you don’t let your mind go down a negative spiral based on the stories you’ve made up in your head. Also, it is no one’s responsibility to manage your neurosis. If your negative spiral  is a product of your own monkey mind, it is unfair to expect others to take on that destructive charge and convince you otherwise.

Zoom out

When you’re in the eye of the storm it’s challenging to see beyond your current condition and state. But this is when it’s more important than ever to try and see the bigger picture. Sometimes the most valuable, life changing lessons and opportunities for growth come disguised in the ugliest of packages. Try your best, focus on the things that you can control and have faith that it will all come together. Be gentle and patient with yourself in the process.

Embrace fluidity

When we make decisions because we’re being jaded from the past or anxious of the future, we restrict flow. We create all these defense mechanisms to try and control things, to avoid pain and disappointment – often at the cost of closing our heart and potential for possibility. It’s in that space of unknown and fluidity where we make space for magic to happen.

You are exactly where you need to be

The question is, where do you want to go now? The possibilities are endless. Is what you are doing, your patterns of behavior, your way of seeing the world getting you closer to the dream life you want? Dreams don’t actualize in an instant, so start planting seeds now.

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Written by Amy C
Amy Chan is the Founder of Renew Breakup Bootcamp, a retreat that takes a scientific and spiritual approach to healing the heart. Marie Claire calls her "A relationship expert whose work is like that of a scientific Carrie Bradshaw" and her company has been featured across national media including Good Morning America, Vogue, Glamour, Nightline along with the front page of The New York Times. Her book, Breakup Bootcamp - The Science of Rewiring Your Heart, published by Harper Collins, will be released Fall 2020. Profile

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Amy Chan in Life
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